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What I Like:
What I Don’t: everything, no plot, no likable characters, mediocre writing, age gap romance
Trigger warnings: Sexual content, Blood, Murder, Cancer, Death of parent, Forced Marriage, Toxic Relationship, Abuse
Unlike the other book we read in February, Promises and Pomegranates had me INCENSED. I yelled so much about this book in our Substack chat and then at our subsequent book club meeting. Some people really enjoyed themselves and I truly love that for them, but for me, this was cringey and awful from start to finish. Let's get into it and I don't plan to hold back so you've been warned. I want to ruin this for you, spoilers ahead.
The book is dual POV and they are both stupid; the book features a pomegranate on the cover and was touted as a Hades/Persephone inspired romance, it isn't but more on that later.
The basic synopsis of this book is Elena, a freshly 18 year old mafia daughter with a pomegranate tattoo on her chest is forced to marry Kal, a 32 mafioso. There is a reason for this, some sort of target on their backs with Elena at the center of it somehow? I don't know, I've blocked out most of this book because I hated it. Kal apparently watched Elena grow up and then she asked him to take her virginity as soon as she was 18, which he happily did.
I kept watch over her after she turned eighteen, fulfilling a favor owed to her father, before allowing my depravity to take hold, giving in when she asked me to ruin her.
No thank you forever. After he literally holds her down through their wedding ceremony, he escorts her back to her home to retrieve her things from her "childhood bedroom." Hello? Do you mean her current bedroom? I want to run him over with a car. While he is waiting for her to get her things, her younger sisters pop in and talk to him for a few minutes when he says this little gem:
Typically, I go out of my way to avoid social interaction, especially with the likes of teenagers, but this wasn't something I could very well avoid.
Sir... do you think me a fool? Does he think we're stupid? He just proudly spoke of "ruining" 18 year old Elena right when she turned 18 but now teenagers are icky? He thinks we're stupid, guys.
Around this same time, while he is waiting for Elena to grab her shit, he becomes so aggravated that his watch is ticking out of sync with the grandfather clock in Elena's home, he removes it, drops the watch onto the ground, draws a weapon and shoots the thing.
In times like these, I like to ask myself "what was the point? What was the author trying to do with this little outburst?" I've got nothing. I didn't find this realistic, necessary, illustrative or relatable. It didn't make him seem likable, desireable or attractive. I think this man needs to be locked up, away from teenagers and jewelry alike. No child or trinket is safe!
Over the span of the rest of the book, there were several other things that had me rolling my eyes so much I gave myself a migraine. Elena gets wet because Kal ate an apple, Kal is referred to as a "doctor" a few times and I have no idea what that was about, I think it was a "doctor of death" thing but that's dumb. Elena's mom also carried out a sexual relationship with Kal at some point (gag) which was beyond disgusting. Also, it has to be said that the Hades/Persephone thing was nowhere to be found except that every so often, he called Elena "Persephone." Stupid. I moved through this book with the same fury that drove Kal to murder that Rolex. I set the audiobook to 3X the speed and just prayed for daylight.
From what I recall from the folks who enjoyed this, they liked the smut and they liked the characters too. I wish I could say the same. I recommend this book to absolutely no one unless you are looking for a decently written book for a good hate read. I hated every word I read.
Also, please enjoy my GoodReads review and follow me there if you'd like!
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